How To Treat A Werewolf (Improved)

Bored of the same daily life cycle? Ever feel like there is more to animal life than dogs and cats? There is a simple solution to that. Just purchase or rent a werewolf from any local mythical pet store. If you hated everything about life before, you will love everything about life now. However, werewolves aren’t exactly the dream pet you expect them to be. If you thought they would be friendly, you were wrong. But this doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be nice to them otherwise you can say hello to the inside of its mouth and goodbye to your life and the dream you wished to have.



Colour:  Grey    Feel: Furry and soft    Eyes: Oval, sharp, intimidating     Paws: Miniature, White    Size: Immense, large, tall, long  


What you need: Cardboard Full Moon, Meat (At Least A Year Supply), A Spacious Garden, A Discipline Collar (Explained Later), A Werewolf Costume


How To Tame It:

If it ever starts chasing you, this means it’s stressed. You must run under the full moon in your garden and dance. As a result, the werewolf will be entertained and stop rampaging.


At points, the werewolf might start growling at you so this means it doesn’t trust you. You must run and put on a werewolf costume. Go back to the room the werewolf is in. Start howling and walking like a werewolf. As a result, it will start to think that you are the same species as it and start trusting you again.


How To Treat It:

If the werewolf is interrupting you during the night, there is a simple solution to make it fall asleep with no side effects or harm done! Grab your cardboard full moon and hold it in front of the werewolf’s face. This part must be done right or the werewolf will rampage and throw tantrums that could kill someone. You must spin it like a wheel left to right 3 times, flip it twice and finally push it forward slowly. If you fail, I can’t guarantee survival.


The werewolf will often walk around and stomp it’s foot or paw because it would be starving. If it doesn’t eat five minutes after he starts, it will find you quite delicious. Fortunately, raw meat can fill them up for months, if you have the right amount of it. So next, you need to carry all the meat you can find and serve your little creature with as much as possible. After a lot of food, it will start to push his head forward, as it’ll be full. Because of this, you must save all the leftovers for the next few months.


Now, werewolves would often become agitated for no complete reason because they are vile creatures. However, this could be easily fixed in seconds with a discipline collar. Just make sure it seems believable to the werewolf. Hold a collar in front of the mythical creature for a few seconds until he taps it as this means he is interested or attracted to it. As soon as it does, slowly take it toward its neck and gently push the sides together until they click so they can connect. Fortunately, the discipline collar comes with a remote to use it because that’s how it works. If the mythical monster attacks or goes crazy, press the button and it will electrocute them . If it tries attacking you after, do it again so that it knows that killing you is not allowed.



One or two last words of warning. Never, and I mean never, try to attack a werewolf for a punishment as it will throw a bigger tantrum then The Fire Of London. This means you should never rash out on a werewolf or its stomach will be your new home!

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