I have never ate a gummy bear whilst swimming in a pond of jelly,

but I have ate a gummy bear from a packet whilst my cat watched me eagerly.

I have never swam through glue,

but I have swam in Arnos pool.

I have never picked up a blue whale,

but I have picked up my heavy dog Bella.

I have never cleaned a crocodiles teeth with a toothbrush,

but I have cleaned my dog’s teeth.

I have never been chased by a teddy bear,

but I have been chased by Bella and her teeth.

I have never went back in time,

but I have looked in my photo book.