Through the door by Rocco
It was an elegant, white house with dahlias growing in the garden and pelargoniums rising in the silver framed windows. The door was open, thoughtlessly he stepped inside; his heart pounding like drums in a circus. The house looked dumbfounded because it had a: comfortable living room with fire crackling the dark cold night; a small kitchen with roast dinner ready to be eaten.
“ Hello, is anyone here?” said Arthur but no one responded. He went up the stairs the higher he got the darker it was, there were 2 toys in either bedroom “ was this a sign he asked, but the beds were beautifully made. Is this house haunted?
“The wish where it is, it’s not here? Aurthr was surprised he drew exactly what he wanted. “Plea… “,but that is when he heard something.
It was in the living room it took big steps, it had a strange deep hiss. Arthur was determined to find out what the thing looked like. He put his nerves aside and went down the stairs.
5 minutes later the noise became louder and louder, he opened the door and Arthur saw it: a triangular head shape, with a greasy green body, razor sharp talons that sliced the floor while he walked and 3 ruby red eyes that shone brighter than the sun. Arthur dashed outside faster than he could blink but then he turned around and said “ I’m doomed.
Hi Rocco, I really like your piece of work. Why are the paragraphs so small? Maybe next time you should make the paragraphs a little bit bigger other then that keep up the extremely excellent work. Well done. Rocco.
Really good but sometimes after your speech marks you do not put speech marks ant the end of the speech so I think you need to improve that.