Memories
I met a boy called Water.
His hair was like a dripping
river from his scalp.
His skin was clear like
a waterfall and his hands
were as soft as silk.
I met a girl called Chocolate.
Her hair smelt like baking
brownies that me hungry.
Her voice was smooth and
sweet.
I met a woman called Warrior.
Her eyes were as grey as ashes
and her hair was as black
As the night sky.
She fought
to end the battle of death.
On the way to park I met Myself
A vision came to me I was
eating chocolate.
This is brilliant Medine! I especially love the Woman called Warrior verse.
Thank you Ava
Well done Medine, I especially like your last verse.
Thank you Mrs Simpson I was hungry that’s why I wrote about chocolate
I like the part of it when it says his hands were as soft as silk. Why in the girl called chocolate part why does it say her hair smelt like baking brownies that me hungry?
I love the last line. It’s mouth watering.
This made me hungry but Brilliant writing
Maybe you could add a bit more writing ?
You could maybe improve the sentences by making them longer.