Do you possess  the necessary skills to save the dying elves? If you do, sign up to become an elf saviour. Our offer includes five blocks of gold, a huge present from Santa and your own elf. If you feel this is the job for you, you will be expected to:

• Travel to Greenland
• carry ten stone of weight
• throw a net
• speak elvish
  Each elf weighs one stone and you have to carry ten elves at a time, so you’d better be strong. If you want this job sign up today at elf.www.net or call 800338884.